Posts Tagged ‘girlfriend’

Common beliefs about rape

In Uncategorized on July 5, 2013 at 4:21 am

This article is written for women and assumes a male offender, however SECASA acknowledges that both men and women can be survivors of sexual abuse and that offenders can be male and female.

MYTH – Women and girls enjoy being raped.
FACT – Rape is a degrading, humiliating and painful experience which no woman enjoys. Some rape victims go through years of trauma, nightmares and suicidal feelings. Nobody enjoys being raped.

MYTH – Men have no control when they are sexually aroused.
FACT – This is an excuse that many men have used, in the same way that they use alcohol as an excuse. ‘I couldn’t help it, I got carried away…’ Men can control themselves and must be responsible for their sexual behaviour. The woman is never responsible for what the rapist does.

MYTH – Women who hitchhike are asking to be raped.
FACT – Women, like men who hitchhike, are asking only for a lift.

MYTH – Only sexy women get raped.FACT – The rapist is not looking for someone sexy, he is looking for a victim. He wants someone who is frightened of him. What you look like is not important.

MYTH – Nice women don’t get raped.

FACT – ‘Nice’ women are often brought up to be the perfect victims for rapists. Nice women don’t yell, hit back, or hurt anyone. They keep secrets.

MYTH – Your clothing (or lack of it) is often the reason for rape.

FACT – What you are wearing has nothing to do with why you are raped. Many women are raped in their school uniforms or pyjamas. If a man wants to rape you, he will not be looking at what you’re wearing. He doesn’t see you as a person, but an object that he can use or abuse.

MYTH – Most rapists are dirty old men or escaped mental patients.

FACT – Most rapists are aged between 15 and 45, though many older men rape too. Rapists are very often married or have girl friends. They will be someone’s father, grandfather, brother, husband, uncle, boyfriend or acquaintance. They could be architects, doctors, teachers, plumbers, truck drivers, unemployed or retired. They are ‘normal’ men.

MYTH – You are more likely to be raped if you go to parties or pubs.

FACT – Most rapes take place in the woman’s home, or the rapist’s home. Rapes are most often planned, and in 80% of cases, the rapist knows the victim.

MYTH – Women usually get raped between the ages of 14 and 25.

FACT – Women as young as 18 months and women as old as 96 have been raped. Girls and women are potential rape victims at any age. The rapist is not looking for someone young or sexy. He’s looking for someone who’s afraid.

MYTH – Rape is a hideous crime and victims get justice through the law.

FACT – It is estimated that only one in twenty rapes in Australia is reported to the Police and there is an overall conviction rate of about 5%.

MYTH – Women only say it is rape if they feel guilty about having sex.

FACT – There are no more false reports of rape to the police than any other crime. Most rapes go unreported because the rapist is known or even related to the victim, and she’s too embarrassed or frightened to report him.

MYTH – Only females get raped.

FACT – Men are also raped, usually by heterosexual men, but they are unlikely to report it because of fears of being seen as homosexual, or abnormal. Men who are raped experience the same kind of humiliation and distress as women.

MYTH – Women who are raped are scarred for life.

FACT – Women do survive rape physically and emotionally, and in the process can become stronger, more self-respecting and aware.

MYTH – Most women say ‘no’ when they mean ‘yes’. They just want to know if a man is strong and can get what he wants.

FACT – When a girl or woman says no, she means no.

MYTH – Men rape because they are desperate for sex, their wives are frigid or they can’t get a girlfriend.

FACT – Men rape because they want power and control over someone weaker than themselves. They use their penis as a weapon to control and humiliate their victim. They rape because their own lives are inadequate and unfulfilled. They do not rape for sexual satisfaction. Most rapists do not enjoy the sex, they say things like “I didn’t enjoy the sex, just the fear in her eyes. ” Rapists often don’t ejaculate.


‘Sex Blog’ Malaysian Student Prepared To Face Consequences

In Uncategorized on October 20, 2012 at 1:15 am

‘Sex Blog’ Malaysian Student Prepared To Face Consequences

SINGAPORE: National University of Singapore law scholar Alvin Tan Jye Yee told Yahoo! Singapore on Tuesday afternoon that he has taken down his joint sex blog with his girlfriend “because there’s been too much trouble for this and we want to stay out of trouble”.

Earlier, the NUS student said erotic photos and videos of himself and his girlfriend going viral was “exciting”.

He had also said he is prepared to face the consequences of posting the sexual content on their personal blog.

On the site “Sumptuous Erotica”, Alvin Tan Jye Yee and Vivian Lee said they love posting about their sex life on the web “for everyone to enjoy” and that they upload only self-made content.

Some of the explicit photos posted on the website show the couple’s naked bodies or body parts, and one shows a bloodstained sanitary pad.

In an interview with Yahoo! Singapore on Tuesday morning, Tan talked about why he started the blog and about facing the consequences of his postings.

“One fine day, we were just fooling around and my girlfriend had the idea of taking nude photos, just taking them, not necessarily uploading them. With more and more photos that we took, we realised we wanted some sort of recognition for our work so we started uploading them on FB but we blurred out the critical parts,” he said.

He added that they started the blog at the end of September this year as the photos kept on getting flagged on FB and had to be taken down. It has since gone viral.

He says he has “mixed feelings” about all the attention the blog has gotten. “Part of me was worried about the real negative consequences like whether I breached anything legal or how would NUS react to this,” he said.

“Of course the other part of me feels it’s quite surreal. I can’t say that I’m not excited,” he added. “It’s not something you get to do everyday, it’s something most people won’t get to do in their whole life so that’s what I mean by exciting. It’s something different and unique.”

He and his girlfriend have even been approached by small companies to endorse sex toys and lingerie, he disclosed.

Tan and Lee, both aged 23 and both Malaysian, are in Malaysia now, and Tan has taken a leave of absence from school to pursue a daily deals business.

On 15 October 2012, someone anonymously asked the couple why they do such things and their reply was, “Because we believe that there’s
nothing inherently wrong with sex.”

“We don’t see why people who are sexually-active and/or being open about their sex lives should be treated as sinners or criminals. Sex is a natural reproductive process that really doesn’t deserve to have a stigma attached to it. Close-minded people need to get over it,” they said.

On facing possible consequences, Tan, who is in his last year as a law student, said that NUS has not contacted him yet.

“So far so good. I wouldn’t say I’m not worried but I’m prepared for it – to be expelled, for my scholarship to be taken away,” he asserted, adding that he is prepared for either or both as he has been on leave from NUS for a year and a half.

“I started my own firm and it’s doing pretty well, so that’s actually my career plan anyway,” he said.

He still wants to come back to Singapore to finish his studies if he can.”I want to do that but I’m not sure if I’ll be allowed to do that anymore. I would definitely go back to Singapore if I’m allowed to,” he said.

Touching on the legal consequences of posting such explicit photos, he explained that all the activities had taken place in Malaysia and the postings had been done there.

“I know that also in law… if you’re not a Singapore national and you committed a crime outside of Singapore then you are basically scot-free,” he said. “I don’t think I’ve contravened anything based on my own legal knowledge.”

He said his friends who have read an article from The Straits Times quoting a lawyer as saying Tan could face charges for breaching the Films Act for the explicit videos do not agree with that lawyer.

“I don’t think I’m in any legal trouble,” he averred.

An ex-classmate of Tan from junior college was not surprised by the NUS student’s behaviour. “He was very competitive in class, really smart and outspoken but at the same time eccentric. He was just plain weird so I wasn’t surprised when he came up with the blog,” she said.

– Yahoo! News

A Mirror or a 2-Way Glass?

In Uncategorized on February 12, 2011 at 7:39 am



A Mirror or a 2-Way Glass?
How can you tell when you are in a room, restroom,
motel etc. with a mirror or a 2-way glass?

Here’s how: I thought it was quite interesting! And I
know in about 30 seconds you’re going to do what I did
and find the nearest mirror.

Do you know how to determine if a mirror is 2-way or
not? A policewoman who travels all over the US and
gives seminars and techniques for businesswomen passed
this on.

When we visit toilets, bathrooms, hotel rooms,
changing rooms, etc., how many of you know for sure
that the seemingly ordinary mirror hanging on the wall
is a real mirror, or actually a 2-way mirror (i.e.,
they can see you, but you can’t see them)? There have
been many cases of people installing 2-way mirrors in
female changing rooms . It is very difficult to
positively identify the surface by looking at it.

So, how do we determine with any amount of certainty
what type of mirror we are looking at?

Just conduct this simple test: Place the tip of your
fingernail against the reflective surface and if there
is a GAP between your fingernail and the image of the
nail, then it is GENUINE mirror. However, if your
fingernail DIRECTLY TOUCHES the image of your nail,

“No Space, Leave the Place” So remember, every time
you see a mirror, do the “fingernail test.” It doesn’t
cost you anything.

REMEMBER. No Space, Leave the Place:

Ladies: Share this with your girlfriends, sisters,
daughters, etc.

Men: Share this with your wives, daughters,
daughters-in-law, mothers, girlfriends and/or friends

DO you feel especially anxious when a particular person has called and left a message (sms/short message service) for you to return the call?

In Uncategorized on September 13, 2009 at 3:39 am

DO you feel especially anxious when a particular person has called and left a message (sms/short message service) for you to return the call?