Archive for March, 2014|Monthly archive page

August 2014, will have 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays

In Uncategorized on March 17, 2014 at 2:47 am

Calendar August 2014

Sun Mon Tues Wed Thur Fri Sat      

1 2
3 4 5 6 7 8 9
10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23
24 25 26 27 28 29 30


August 2014, will have 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays.  This happens only once every 823 years.  The Chinese call it ‘Silver pockets full. “So: send this message to your friends and in four days money will surprise you. Based on Chinese Feng Shui. Whoever does not transmit the message… may find themselves poor
I obeyed (you never know).


Barack Obama jokes

In Uncategorized on March 17, 2014 at 2:40 am
 Q: What does Barack Obama call illegal aliens? A: Undocumented democrats.
Q: Barack Obama is on a sinking ship, who gets saved? A: The Country!
Q: What drink do you get with the McObama Happy Meal in Pakistan? A: No drink JUST ICE!
Q: What did Osama Bin Laden’s ghost say to Mitt Romney? A: “Don’t be sad, Obama’s foreign policy killed me too”
Q: Whats Michelle Obamas favorite vegetable? A: Barackoli
Q: What’s the difference between Ross Perot and Barack Obama? A: Ross Perot is crackpot with big ears; Barack Obama is a pothead with big ears. A muslim, a socialist, and a communist walk into a bar. The bartender says hello Mr. President.
Q: Why won’t Barack Obama be celebrating his 51st birthday? A: Republicans won’t let Democrats raise taxes on the rich let alone Barack Obama’s age!
Q: Why did Obama change his name from Barry to Barack? A: He thought Barry sounded too American. U.S Presidents and Statesmen are on every piece Of U.S. currency. So Will Barack Obama Be Placed On The FoodStamp Card? What kind of doctor do you need to fix Obamacare? A URLologist
Q: What do Barack Obama & Tiger Woods have in common? A: They are both trying to screw everybody!
Q: What’s the main difference between Romneycare and Obamacare? A: The name.
Q: Why did Barack Obama save the auto industry? A: Because his shareholders are the American people!
Q: Other than health care what other promises has Barack Obama made to the American People? A: Balancing the budget, reining in the banks and putting a unicorn in every backyard!
Q: Why won’t Obama release his real birth certificate? A: He accidently smoked it.
Q: How did Barack Obama propose to Michelle Robinson? A: He got down on one knee and said “I don’t wanna be Obama self.
Q: How do you know your doctor is not a fan of Obama’s Health Care Plan? A: He/she has remodeled the waiting room with death paneling.
Q: Why can’t Obama dance? A: Cause he has two leftist feet.
Q: What’s more unacceptable than another 4 years of Obamacare? A: Another 8 years of Romneycare! Dear Women voters, Barack Obama lives in a house full of women. Mitt Romney has binders full of women.
Q: How is Obama going to make the tabacco industry pay for health care reform? A: By allowing Marlboro Miles to be redeemed for health care coverage!
Q: How is Barack Obama going to get Republicans to cross party lines and support health care reform? A: By giving their mistresses free breast implants! Q: Will health care be different under Barack Obama’s new reforms? A: No, but if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then!
Q: Why is Healthcare reform so important to the enigmatic Barack Obama? A: His pregnant mom was turned away from many hospitals and was forced to give birth in a manger!
Q: Why is it pointless for Barack Obama to hold Senior Citizens Q & A sessions on the internet? A: Because microwave ovens don’t have internet connections!
Q: Under Obama’s health care plan can you get coverage for preexisting conditions? A: Certainly, as long as they don’t require any treatment!


When justice is tempered with mercy

In Uncategorized on March 17, 2014 at 1:58 am

When justice is tempered with mercy

March 5, 2012

English translation:
An Indonesian judge by the name of Marzuki was sitting in
judgment of an old lady who pleaded guilty of stealing
some tapioca from a plantation.
In her defence, she pleaded to the judge that she was
done the deed because she was poor and her son was sick
while her grandchild was hungry.
The plantation manager insisted that she be punished as a
deterrent to others.

The judge going through the documents then look up and
said to the old lady, “I’m sorry but I cannot make any
exception to the law and you must be punished.”
The old lady was fined Rp. 1 million (USD 100) and if she
could not pay the fine, then she will be jailed for 2 and
a half years as demanded by the law.
She wept as she could not pay the fine.

The judge then took off his hat and put in Rp. 1 million
into the hat and said “In the name of justice, I fine all
who are in the court Rp. 50 thousand (USD 5.50)
as dwellers of this city and letting a child to starve
until her grandmother has to steal to feed her
The  registrar will now collect the fines from all the

The court managed to collect Rp 3.5 million (USD 200)
whereby once the fine was paid off, the rest was given to
the old lady … .including the fine collected from the
plantation manager ….


In Uncategorized on March 17, 2014 at 1:51 am
I tried to catch some fog.  I mist. 

When chemists die, they barium. 

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst. 

A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran. 

I know a guy who’s addicted to brake fluid.  He says he can stop any time. 

How does Moses make his tea?  Hebrews it. 

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went.  Then it dawned on me. 

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I’d never met herbivore. 

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity.  I can’t put it down. 

I did a theatrical performance about puns.  It was a play on words.

They told me I had type A blood, but it was a type-O. 

This dyslexic man walks into a bra. 

I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me. 

A cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils. 

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble. 

What does a clock do when it’s hungry?  It goes back four seconds.

I wondered why the ball was getting bigger. Then it hit me! 

Broken pencils are pointless. 

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?  A thesaurus. 

England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool. 

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest. 

I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx. 

All the toilets in London police stations have been stolen.
Police say they have nothing to go on. 

I took the job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Velcro – what a rip off! 

Cartoonist found dead in home.  Details are sketchy.

The majestic Swiss mountain

In Uncategorized on March 1, 2014 at 6:32 am

Shot in Switzerland, this video of the Matterhorn, the majestic Swiss mountain, is absolutely stunning. It was shot by a traveller who camped out for several weeks at an altitude of 2,700 meters (8,858 feet) to create this beautiful video. Well done.